brendonross: The beginning of I Write Sins Not...
People on the Internet: I love that band.
Me: OMG REALLY? LET'S BE BEST FRIENDS!!1!!11!
People at school: I love that band.
Me: no you don't.
News in Britain: stamps have gone up 14 pence
News in America: cannibal eats man's face
News in Canada: man mails hand to parliament building
News on tumblr: cannibal is suspected to actually be Shia Labeouf
myreligioniskindness: my brother tried to pick up a banana to make it look like he was talking on the phone but all the bananas in the bunch came with it and he just looked at me and went “i guess it’s a conference call”
Tim Burton should just make a movie called ‘Johnny Depp’. plot twist: Johnny Depp is played by Helena Bonham Carter
methlabrador: what if one day you were scrolling through your dashboard when you saw a picture that someone took of you doing something weird that you didnt know anybody saw you doing with like 20k notes
Parents: Why are you always staying inside?
Me: - goes out-
Parents: Why are you always out?
Me: Should I stay in the middle of the door so that way you won't have to complain no more if I go out or if I stay in...
groovymuttations: “it’s them” the home depot employees whisper as the hipster bloggers grab paint swatches to write inspirational quotes on
haydenrodgers: sherlockisasexybeast: kawree: stfuconservatives: 4-year-old sings “Ain’t No Homos Gonna Make it to Heaven” in church, receives standing ovation CHARMING wow i think that’s actually the most offensive thing i’ve seen all week. congratulations. This is actually, kinda, really twisted. The kid is four. Four. And he’s being encouraged. And over here we have some...
Kids at my school: I like to smoke weed and get high and I also like to smoke cigarettes.
Me: Sometimes when it's cold, I like to breathe really heavy and pretend i'm a dragon.
keithmorris: i wanted to know what a duck looked like without a beak so i googled it and ive been laughing at this photo for about 3 minutes
A person who doesn't have tumblr showing me...
Me: I saw that already
Only 1 left to vote!
andrewducote: Help us win our dream wedding: !!!VOTE HERE!!!
Growing up you have this view of mermaids
thebestlolz: and then you watch Goblet of Fire
FINALLY, I can link my Facebook account to my Tumblr account so all my friends...– No one, ever. (via scoldylox)
That awkward moment when you're sitting and eating...
sodamnrelatable: via sodamnrelatable
xxpictureme: literallysame: ridhard: OMFG give me one Ridiculous
When you see pictures of your friends hanging out... →
10knotes: Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard
Anonymous asked: how do you get your font small...
i whisper very softly to the keyboard
mrcraabs: roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts
According to USA Today, the average tumblr user...
I probably spend 2.5 hours a month OFF tumblr